Meet Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher of North Carolina. They have been married 85 years (86 in May) and hold the Guinness World Record for the longest marriage of a living couple and get this…. Zelmyra is 101 years old and Herbert is 104. The happily married couple teamed up with twitter this Valentine’s Day to answer some relationship questions. Check out their take on finding love, getting through hard times and more. Good read.

1. What made you realize that you could spend the rest of your lives together? Were you scared at all?
H & Z: With each day that passed, our relationship was more solid and secure. Divorce was NEVER an option - or even a thought.
2. How did you know your spouse was the right one for you?
We grew up together & were best friends before we married. A friend is for life - our marriage has lasted a lifetime
3. Is there anything you would do differently after more than 80 years of marriage?
We wouldn’t change a thing. There’s no secret to our marriage, we just did what was needed for each other & our family.
4. What is your advice to someone who is trying to keep the faith that Mr. Right is really out there?
Zelmyra: Mine was just around the corner! He is never too far away, so keep the faith - when you meet him, you’ll know.
5. What was the best piece of marriage advice you ever received?
Respect, support & communicate with each other.Be faithful, honest & true.Love each other with ALL of your heart
6. What are the most important attributes of a good spouse?
Zelmyra: A hard worker & good provider.The 1920s were hard,but Herbert wanted & provided the best for us.I married a good man!
7. What is your best Valentine’s Day memory?
Zelmyra: I cook dinner EVERY day. Herbert left work early & surprised me – he cooked dinner for me! He is a VERY good cook!
Herbert: I said that I was going to cook dinner for her & she could relax - the look on her face & clean plate made my day!
8.You got married very young – how did you, both, manage to grow as individuals yet not grow apart as a couple?
“Everyone who plants a seed & harvests the crop celebrates together” We are individuals, but accomplish more together.
9. What is your fondest memory of your 85-year marriage?
Our legacy: 5 children, 10 grandchildren, 9 great-grandchildren, and 1 great-great grandchild.
10. Does communicating get easier with time? How do you keep your patience?
The children are grown, so we talk more now. We can enjoy our time on the porch or our rocking chairs - together.
11. How did you cope when you had to be physically separated for long periods of time?
Herbert: We were apart for 2 months when Z was hospitalized with our 5th child. It was the most difficult time of my life. Zelmyra’s mother helped me with the house and the other children, otherwise I would have lost my mind.
12. At the end of bad relationship day, what is the most important thing to remind yourselves?
Remember marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win
13. Is fighting important?
NEVER physically! Agree that it’s okay to disagree, & fight for what really matters. Learn to bend - not break!
14. What’s the one thing you have in common that transcends everything else?
We are both Christians & believe in God. Marriage is a commitment to the Lord.We pray with & for each other every day.

The first thing you must realize and keep in the forefront of your mind is that getting the girl to fall in love with you really depends on how big your heart is and if you are faint in heart, you will never win her over. If you are really in love with her your feelings for her must be communicated not by the words of the mouth, but by the words of the heart.

Here’s are some pointers to help you along the path of winning her love.

First you must make a good first impression. You first impression is a lasting impression. To do this you don’t have to talk, dress or do the common things that other guys do. Be unique. Have your own style. Dress decently, talk decently (i.e. watch your language), show good habits, and don’t drink or smoke if you think this will offend her.

Secondly, patience is the key so don’t rush things. Take your time. Think carefully and plan to steps. Yous plan should always reflect a romantic style.

Thirdly, focus on being the best friend you can be to her. Being her friend and understanding her is important. Understand that she loves to be loved, adores to be adored and needs to be needed. Take the time to get to know what she likes and dislikes, and what her style is. Build your love on friendship for long term success.

Fourthly, find a way to be supportive. Look for opportunities to show that she can count on you to be there for her. Be a friend that she can always turn to. Don’t hesitate to be helpful and supportive. Be that friend who rekindles her zeal and restores hope back into her life when she looses hope. Strive to be her daily vitamin that brings out the best in her in terms of personality and character. Then she will have found that friend whom she can open up to, share with and feel comfortable with. Make it a priority to be there to celebrate the good times, and to lend an ear when she needs you to listen as a friend.

Fifthly, find a way to make her feel special. Do all you can to boost her self esteem. Let her know that she has touched your life in a very special way like no one could. Compliment her often for the pleasure of her company and for being there when you needed her, when you felt sad and all alone. Show appreciations for the comfort she offers you and for making you smile.

Gradually open up to her. In your day to day talks, share more of your dreams, your world, and every aspect of your life. Always take time to dream with her, build with her, cheer her on and encourage her. Tell her how much you think about her even when you try not to. Let her know that she’s your first thing on your mind in the morning and the last thing when you go to bed at night. “Her knowing that you were thinking of her when you slipped beneath the softness of your blanket and gave in to the bliss of sweet dreams, will make her go ‘my my’ and her heart will sing your name all the year round.”

Learn to be creative and constructive to keep her interest in you. Stay in contact with her as much as possible without being overly annoying. Call her regularly, even when she least expects it. After a date just drop her home and with a friendly handshake, wish her good night. Don’t kiss her when she expects you to. Earn her respect as a gentleman by being patient with her. Your patience will pay off.

Increase your demand. Make her realize that when she feels tired, sad, sick, bored and cold, she’s actually missing vitamin you. By then, she’ll be so into you and she won’t want to continue without you. Then and only then, with open and honest communication, honestly promise her a lifetime of everlasting devotion, loyalty, respect, and unconditional love. Prove to her that you’ll always be there for her, to listen and to hold her hand, and that you’ll always do your best to make her happy, and feel loved.

I say this quote and wanted to share it with you. It read: “Remember, patience is the key to her heart; be like that gardener watching a fruit as it hangs on the tree, day after day admiring it, but, exercising tremendous self-discipline, neither feeling the fruit, nor pinching it, nor testing it to see if it is ready. And then, one day he holds out his hand and the fruit simply drops into it, ripe, warm and eager to be eaten.”

The more patience and self-control you practice will make you more attractive and charming. This will qualify you to win her heart hands down.

Now do meet the girl of your dreams as soon as possible, make her fall in love with you, and make her feel the happiest woman in the world!

Not Your Typical Relationship Advice

Author: Beth Banning

Are you having trouble understanding why someone in your life says upsetting things to you? Why would they want to hurt you like that? Would you believe that it is really them and has absolutely nothing to do with you? Once you come to terms with this idea you can irrevocably free yourself of the anxiety and frustration that comes when you think you are being harmed by other peoples words or actions.

Feeling Insulted?

it is tricky not to get offended when someone says something hurtful to you. We all want to get defensive and might go right back at them with something even more cutting. However, when you understand what causes the other person to act that way, you will actually come to understand that it has little or nothing to do with you! It is strange to think that you are one-half of an conversation with another person, and yet the painful words they blurt out may have less than nothing to do with you but it’s positively true.

That Person Has Serious Issues!

Have you ever noticed when you talk to a friend about the distasteful things your boy/girlfriend, husband/wife, mother/father… just said to you, they reply with, Well, it sounds like they must have problems they need to deal with. Actually, that’s true! it’s difficult to believe, though, because we all think that the world rotates around us, that everything said has to have something to do with us. That person’s got to want to offend me in some way, otherwise he would never have said that to me, right?

Actually, it’s very important for us to step back and realize that it isn’t all about us all the time. If you eliminate yourself from the situation and see it from the other persons point of reference, you can see that your boy/girlfriend, cousin, sister/brother… does in fact have troubles they are attempting to work out. The words they say are meant to speak to one of two issues: (1) a desire to meet their needs, or (2) in support of something that they value. Even though in the moment these words are challenging to hear in those terms, we all are likely to talk this way and say things that are trying to meet one or both of those criteria.

When we understand that their words are meant to meet their needs or support their values, it is much easier to react lightly to what others say to us. We all tend to get offended when something is said that seems hurtful, but if we remind ourselves of the reasons they said those things in the first place, we can see that it really has nothing to do with us at all. This relieves stress and creates a better environment to move on with things without feeling hurt.

For instance, you have just left work to drive home after learning that you got a big raise. You are incredibly excited and you call your very best friend to tell them the good news. As you tell them the news, you realize they are not as happy for you as you had hope. that’s a lot of hours to work. You are going to be so exhausted everyday. I’ll be surprised if you can make it six months in your new position. Wow, now that was yucky!

Why doesn’t your friend seem please for you? Why would they say something so unfriendly to you? If you discovered that they had been passed up for a promotion the day before, would that change the way you react? What if your friend told you that they were worried your new promotion would cut into the time you spend together? When you think of all the reasons that your friend could have said these things, you realize that in fact none of them are because of you.

As you take this all in, you discover that reacting emotionally and letting the discomfort overwhelm you will not help the situation at all. When you step back and put yourself in the other persons shoes, you can begin to see that getting upset will only make things worse.

How Might Mother Theresa React?

Imagine one of the most selfless people in the entire world, Mother Theresa. What if someone came up to her and said, I don’t think you’re that great. Look at all the people that support you to do what you do. I think you’re overestimated. its challenging to imagine Mother Theresa getting irritated and frustrated over a comment like this. (In fact, it’s hard to imagine anyone having the nerve to say that to her, but let us imagine just for the sake of argument.)

Many people might reply to a comment like that by saying, What have you done in your life? You’ve got a lot of nerve talking to me like that, you’re pitiful!
However, it’s hard to believe Mother Theresa replying in that way. But why is this? Does she know something that others do not?

Well, yes. Mother Theresa recognizes how to let go of the resentment and the hurt that can come from misinterpreting comments like that. She recognizes that the reason behind such remarks come as from a persons desire to satisfy their needs and to help support the things they value. In this situation the person probably feels very disappointed with what they’ve accomplished and needs some encouragement. Looking for flaws in others is a common strategy to feel better about oneself–a approach that never works very well or for very long.

Accepting

it’s challenging to fight off the feelings of hurt and resentment, but when you learn to step back and think about the situation from a different perspective you will be relieved at how upset -free your life can be. When you stop fixating on what others are saying to you and realize that they are simply attempting to deal with their own issues, you are much better off. In turn, you open yourself up to a authentic compassion for yourself and the people around you.

So next time you notice yourself getting upset by the words of another, stop and tell yourself it’s not about you. Experience the true compassion that comes from walking in the other person’s moccasins. Ask yourself: “what might be going on for me that could cause me to say or do that.” Then let yourself relax knowing that it’s not about you and that we’re all just attempting to meet our needs and support the things we value.

About the Author:

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Relationship Advice: the Danger of the Routine

Author: Daryl Campbell

Remember the early days of your dating relationship? What a time you both had. It seemed like every moment you got together it was music, fun and excitement. Some of your family and friends even hated to see you coming because the two of you were so into each other it made people nauseous. You are probably right when you say they were just jealous. And guess what? Neither one of you could have cared less. The relationship was fresh, spontaneous and exhilarating.

And then it happened. You cannot quite put your finger on when exactly it took place but it happened. Whether it occurred sometime after you got married or six months into your dating relationship is inconsequential. All you know is the music, fun and excitement went on permanent vacation. What took their place? The routine.

One of the mains reasons many couples get blind sided by the routine is the seduction of familiarity. You naturally want to become well acquainted with the other person in the hopes that it leads to greater intimacy between the two of you. That is the point of relationships. Unfortunately, familiarity also inspires a certain amount of self-satisfaction. In other words consciously or unconsciously, many couples tell themselves the prize has been won so there is no need to continue the game.

While some people do not consider this a big deal, in essence it is a planted seed that can spell trouble somewhere down the road. It is only a hop, skip and a jump from familiarity to routine to dissatisfaction.

Now there is no question that your relationship is going to have certain amount of routine due, in some part to circumstances beyond your control; for instance your work schedules may only allow the two of you to get together on specific days and times. However there are things you can do to keep the relationship fresh:

1. The Thrill of the Impulsive

When your relationship was just starting out, spontaneity ruled. The two of you did not even think twice about hopping into a car and going to places you had never been or trying out a new restaurant with food you never heard of. There was something thrilling and wonderful about not knowing what you were getting into yet still having the courage to explore anyway.

Routine tells you to be rational and self conscious. What if people are looking or you run into someone you both know? The answer is “who cares?” Sure being spontaneous may not work out every time but do it anyway and go with the flow. Unplanned adventures big or little have a way of adding excitement and in many cases some serious laughs to the relationship which is very healthy and great way to reconnect.

2. It is Not Your Birthday

Or anniversary or any other major routine event but do not let that stop you from buying small gifts for each other. In fact you can just as easily create your own special days. It could be the anniversary of your third date or the time you both laughed through the worst movie you ever saw. Occasionally giving a small gift for no particular reason lets the other person know that they are always in your heart.

3. Date Again

Not just going out to dinner either because that also can become routine. Instead plan a time outside of your normal schedules and treat it like you did during the early days of the relationship. Get yourselves spruced up. Go at it with the mindset that you are making every effort to make a good impression. Having a special time together at least once a week can throw a beautiful monkey wrench into the routine machine. .

It is nothing out of the ordinary for a relationship to lose some of its zing over time. The problem comes when couples accept the routine as normal and do not do anything to restore the excitement and unpredictability they once had. You can always reverse the process by being spontaneous, give small gifts for no reason other than to let the other person know you love them and start dating again like it is the first time. This all requires constant effort but the payoff of an exciting relationship is well worth it.

About the Author:

Daryl Campbell invites you to get tons of relationship and dating tips, tools, videos, up to the minute information as well as a free copy of 101 Romantic Ideas. It’s all at The Dating Tip

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Relationship Advice: a Simple Mindset That Can Transform your Relationship

Author: Richard Nicastro, Ph.D.

In my work with couples over the years, I’ve learned that it’s just as important to take note of what’s working in a relationship than what isn’t. And, although people have different ways of naming it, what many successful couples share in common is the ability to take perspective.

The ability to take perspective is vital to your relationship. Let’s look at some of the ways taking perspective works:

The big-picture mindset

When your relationship hits a lull or rough patch, you become nearsighted. You see all the problems that are close at hand clearly while the other parts of your relationship (which might include a loving history and numerous strengths) becomes blurred. For many couples this can lead to serious problems since their relationship begins to feel broken and hopeless.

If you hold a big-picture mindset, you’re able to experience the trials and tribulations that all couples go through without drowning in them. This is because you’re able to hold onto the other, positive facets of your relationship while you’re dealing with the stressful events. This larger perspective allows you to be upset with your partner in the moment while feeling secure about the relationship.

The awareness of life’s transitory nature

When you’ve encountered pain in your life, you may have heard or recalled the oft-repeated phrase, “This, too shall pass.” For many, the mindset that all experiences — even difficult ones — have a beginning and an end provides comfort. If you and your partner adopt this approach, you’ll be better equipped to weather the stormy periods every relationship experiences, because you’ll hold onto the hope that in time the tides will shift in your favor.

This is a powerful form of perspective-taking. It places all events on a timeline. Have you ever noticed how something can feel so enormous one day yet almost insignificant a few days later? You can use the perspective of “This too shall pass” by asking yourself the following question:

How important is this issue to me today? How important will it a month from now? A year from now?

Answering these questions will help you build greater perspective in your relationship. Note that using this kind of perspective should never become an excuse for not working on issues that are important to you and your partner. This isn’t about developing a laissez faire attitude. Rather, it’s to help you place events in a perspective that will allow you to work on issues in a level-headed manner.

Stepping in your partner’s shoes

Your viewpoint is one reality and your partner’s is another. At times these viewpoints will overlap (and your relationship will feel harmonious), while at other times they will be quite different (causing tension between you and your partner). When differences exist, it’s reflexive to defend your own position and see your partner as wrong or unsympathetic. Since your partner is probably feeling the same way about you, this is a lose-lose situation for your relationship. In these moments couples often become deeply entrenched in their conflicting positions and wage a futile battle.

What do you think would happen if you were to temporarily shelve your well-defended opinions and attempt to see the world through your partner’s eyes? Such a flexible and empathic stance will allow you and your partner to feel connected even while disagreeing with one another. Taking your partner’s perspective (even when you might not agree with him or her) is a surefire way to keep your relationship strong and healthy. I realize this is easier said than done and, once emotions escalate, nearly impossible.

A good rule of thumb is to practice taking your partner’s perspective (while s/he practices taking yours), before things get too heated. You’ll avoid many unnecessary fights and feel closer to each other this way.

Learning to take perspective is just one way to create a stronger relationship. To discover others, visit http://StrengthenYourRelationship.com/ and sign up for Dr. Nicastro’s FREE monthly newsletter. As a bonus, you’ll receive two FREE reports that you can begin using immediately with your partner.

About the Author:

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a psychologist and relationship coach who is passionate about helping couples protect the sanctuary of their relationship. Rich and his wife Lucia founded LifeTalk Coaching, an internet-based coaching business that helps couples strengthen their relationships.

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Relationship Advice: a Simple Mindset That Can Transform your Relationship

Relationship Advice: the Abc’s of Effective Communication

Author: Richard Nicastro, Ph.D.

Communication is the foundation of your relationship. Without it, you can’t really have much of a relationship–just imagine how futile it is to build a house on quicksand rather than concrete. And with healthy, reciprocal communication, your marriage or relationship will continue to evolve in a positive direction.

Therefore, it behooves all of us to understand the fundamentals of communication so that we can apply them to our cherished relationships. It’s easy to lose sight of these fundamentals and wonder why your relationship is in trouble.

Communication basics:

All conversations involve a speaker (the person sending messages) and a listener (the person receiving messages). You’ll need different skills for each role. An effective speaker without an effective listener is like a billboard in a desert. Communication breaks down when you (or your partner) fail to use the different skills needed in the respective roles of speaker and listener.

Let’s look at the fundamentals of each role.

The ABC’s of an effective Speaker:

A: Acknowledgement. Start with your needs.

As the speaker, your goal is to acknowledge your needs and share them with your partner, not to shine a spotlight on your partner. For instance, if you’re frustrated with your partner’s failure to help out around the house, you might say, “I’ve been doing most of the cleaning and it feels unfair to me. I need us to be a team and work together around the house,” instead of, “You never help me. What do you do all day?”

B: Body Language. Be aware of how you send your messages.

All communication includes a what (the content of your message) and a how (how you deliver the content). Body language is the how–the message’s gift wrapping. Very often, this is the message your partner will remember most. The tone and volume of your voice, facial expression, eye contact, and posture will enhance or block your message. Like an email message that ends up snagged by a spam filter, if your body language exudes disinterest, judgement or hostility, your partner is likely to disregard your message.

C: Clarity. Keep your message simple and consistent.

Your message needs to be clear and easy to understand, or else your partner will be confused and unsure of your needs. Clarity begins with knowing what you want to say before you say it. Jumping from topic to topic and/or sending mixed messages violates the clarity rule. Make every effort to stay “on task” while you’re discussing something with your partner. How many of us would be able to internalize a message if we’re unsure of what the message really is, or if we feel overwhelmed by pop-up tangents?

The ABC’s of an effective Listener:

A: Attentiveness. Be attentive and focus your energy on your partner’s message.

As the listener, your job is to show that you are interested in what your partner is saying. This occurs through commonsense courtesy (not answering the phone or checking email while your partner is speaking) and through the unspoken messages you send with body language (eye contact, nodding when appropriate, sitting up straight, not fidgeting).

B: Bite your Tongue. Your job as the listener is to understand your partner’s point of view.

There’s a saying in twelve-step treatment programs that goes something like: Take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth. As the listener, don’t interrupt or talk over your partner (even when you don’t agree with what s/he is saying). Don’t plan your retort the entire time your partner is speaking. Work on being receptive and open to your partner’s message rather than contemplating counter-arguments.

C: Curiosity and Clarification. Simple questions communicate genuine interest while helping you gain clarity.

When appropriate (when your partner isn’t in the middle of a statement), show genuine curiosity by asking questions–questions that will help you clarify what your partner needs. You don’t have to be Dr. Phil to do this well. The most powerful questions are simple: Are you OK? What can I do? How can I help? When you show curiosity and seek clarification, your partner will feel that you’re engaged and interested.

This simple ABC model of communication can go a long way in helping you become a more effective communicator. To build a stronger relationship, share these ideas with your partner. Practice taking turns as the speaker and listener. Before you know it, your communication ABC’s will become a habit and your relationship or marriage will reap the benefits.

To discover other tips on how to improve your marriage or relationship, visit http://StrengthenYourRelationship.com/ and sign up for Dr. Nicastro’s FREE Relationship Toolbox Newsletter. As a bonus, you will receive two FREE reports that will help you build a stronger, more vibrant relationship.

About the Author:

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a psychologist and relationship coach who is passionate about helping couples protect the sanctuary of their relationship. Rich and his wife Lucia founded LifeTalk Coaching, an internet-based coaching business that helps couples strengthen their relationships.

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Relationship Advice: the Abc’s of Effective Communication

Relationship Advice For Men - What Women Wish You Knew

Author: Joshua Uebergang

Men, you can no longer can club a woman across the head and drag her to your cave. If you want a relationship with a woman, there’s some advice you need to follow. When you follow this help, you’ll have women walking into your cave at their will.

As hard as it to believe sometimes being a man, women are humans. They make up half of the world’s population. And what is it that all humans want in relationships? We all want to feel great. Women especially love being around men who make them feel great. I’m talking at an emotional, not physical, level.

When a woman is talking with her friends, if you made her feel great, she will brag about you. “Well, what did you talk about?” her friends ask. “I don’t know. I just felt great!” she replies. If you make people feel great, they don’t have to remember what you did, what you said, or how you said it. They will remember how you make them feel.

What’s some relationship advice to make women feel great? Contrary to what most communication experts teach, I don’t advise men to compliment a woman unless you’re clearly in a relationship with her. Giving compliments subtracts from your power, something women wish their man had more of.

One of the best ways to make a woman feel great is to be funny. You don’t want to be a clown, because women don’t go to the circus for a relationship, but humor is a universally attractive quality. The type of humor I recommend you develop is cocky and funny. It gently teases. One example is saying, “Stop looking at me like a piece of meat”, with a sly smile.

Another piece of relationship advice men need to take to have better relationships with women is to stop giving advice. It’s advice to stop giving advice.

As men, we feel compelled to solve problems. We fix cars. Repair homes. Recover lost data from computers. And even gives each other advice on careers, dating, and other areas.

It may surprise you that when a woman talks to you about a problem, she isn’t after you to solve it. When we apply our problem-solving mindset to relationships with women, they become dejected. They wonder why their man just won’t listen. A woman doesn’t share her problems to have them solved - she only wants empathy and understanding. We all want to be understood.

The cure to the advice-giving syndrome is to emphatically listen. The active listening skills I encourage you to use in your relationships is not one of silence as you bite your tongue and resist giving advice. Focus on your partner, reflect her words and feeling, and enter her reality. It can be uncomfortable, but she will thank you for it.

Men, follow this free relationship advice and you will develop good relationships with women. Unless you want the police arresting you, put that club away and follow these lessons.

About the Author:

Joshua Uebergang, aka “Tower of Power”, is a young communication skills coach, author, and owner of Tower of Power. Visit his blog and sign-up free to get relationship communcation skills by email, along with blog updates, and more! Go now to Tower of Power.

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Relationship Advice For Men - Little Things Make A Big Difference

Author: Terry Ross

Do your feel that marriage is getting on top of you? If you feel the only answer is to break free, relationship advice for men will help you see things from a different perspective. It doesn’t take a lot to improve your marriage in fact it’s the little things that make a difference.

Some men get it right at the outset but so often get too comfortable in a relationship and are oblivious to the advice that little gestures still count. They get to the stage where they feel that little things are too insignificant in the scheme of things, lose focus or just get so wrapped up with life that they can’t be bothered. Nothing in this life is for free, relationships are no different they have to be worked at.

For women to feel fulfilled they need to feel loved, it is rare for a woman not to want and need those small gestures. How often do you hear women moaning to their friends or colleagues about the insensitivity of their husband, how he doesn’t understand her, puts no thought into the gifts he buys, if he buys any, or just doesn’t seem to care. If you did a survey how many women would say that they feel they are just taken for granted……

Remember, nothing in this life if for free, my relationship advice for men is take care of your partner, show that you love her, take time to understand her, appreciate her and encourage her, don’t take her for granted.

Those little gestures make a real difference, the hug when you get home at night, the kiss when you see each other, the odd gift and showing interest in her day.

Show respect for your partner:

• Listen to her, respect her point of view.

• Don’t bulldoze her into your way of thinking.

• Don’t assume you’re above doing all those boring household tasks. Do you think your wife really enjoys them??

• Offer to help, don’t wait to be asked.

• Encourage your wife and support her in anything she wants to do.

• Put your partner and your relationship first.

• Don’t just think of your own needs when lovemaking.

• Don’t cheat on your spouse.

Marriage is a partnership, a two way street, don’t assume that it can work with all the effort coming from one side. Don’t run, don’t try and break free, follow relationship advice that has been tried and tested. Think about little gestures and which will be right for your wife. I can’t tell you exactly what to do, people are different and appreciate different things, but I can point you in the right direction. Saving your marriage is now down to you.

Get involved in your marriage, don’t sit on the edge and look in. Show that you care, pay compliments, offer to help, plan surprises, respond when she talks to you and show an interest in what she does. Notice when your wife is tired or upset, tell her you love her, show her you love her, treat her in the same way as you did when you first went out.

You have sought relationship advice, don’t just go away and carry on doing things as you are now, really think about how you used to treat your wife, before you were married, she hasn’t changed she is still the same person underneath and will still appreciate the same things.

Those little things in life really do make a big difference.

About the Author:

For more advice please visit my websites Save your Marriage or Common Marriage Problems

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Keep the one you love and not take for granted. Do not wait for the early symptoms of breakup before you act to keep the one you love. Long before a relationship gets broken down, you can improve your relationship and ensure that both of you are happy in the process. Learn about relationships and you can hold on to your beloved for as long as you want.

An important ingredient of any relationship is communication. As such, you keep the one you love by always maintaining your communication. Be honest and open so that you can easily sort through any problem that may come your way. Through this transparency, you can improve your relationship and hold on to each other till eternity.

Romantic love works best during the first year or so of any relationship. After that, the feeling wanes and you’ll wonder where it went. You may try to look for it in other relationships but it will be the same story - romantic love fades fast. But when romance fades, commitment comes in. Love is not only about feelings and emotions; it is also about commitment and action. Sometimes, however, such a commitment may prove to be difficult to make especially if it involves sacrifice.

Commitment may also fail from time to time. As such, you need to keep falling in love with each other. There will come a time that both of you will become bored with each other. Especially in marriage, life may be reduced to waiting for paycheck after paycheck, paying the bills, driving the kids to school and driving them back home. Before long, you feel as if the love is totally gone and commitment might not be enough to make you stay in the relationship.

In this case, you need to keep the fires of love burning. You can do this by going to the places you used to go; doing the things that you both love doing and going on a vacation together. You can also try out new things together. One of the best ways to keep the one you love is to do things together that keep both of you happy.

Love needs fuel in order to keep going. You can keep the one you love by always fueling your love with new activities and adventures and by always affirming your love.

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As time passes by, the fires of a relationship may die down and if both of the couples do not know how to save a relationship, what was once a thriving and passionate relationship will become mere embers. If you have a boyfriend or a girlfriend or perhaps you have been married for several years now, you should learn how to save your relationship before it becomes irretrievably lost. The following tips are suggestions on how you can keep the love alive and enjoy each other”��s company even after several years have already passed.

Rediscover each other. There are times that you tend to view everything in your relationship as a routine, having to do this and that. What happens is that you get used to each other and you fail to realize that there are still a number of areas in your lives that you have not truly explored. This happens especially when you are already married. The demands of life, the bills that must be paid, and even the burden of raising your kids may become walls that keep you from enjoying your partner”��s company.

The dangerous thing is that if one of the couples tries to recapture the old feeling with a fleeting affair. When you are tempted to start an affair, pause for a while. Ask yourself whether your relationship is worth risking over the feeling of being in love. What about your love for your partner? When you come right down to it, the cost of the affair is not worth your time and your effort.

You might want to have dates at the old places where you used to go - dine at fancy restaurants, walk on the beach, and go to the park. This might work for a time but most of the time, what happens is that you begin to wonder what happened to the feelings you used to have. If this does not work out, then there is still another way you should follow to learn how to save a relationship.

Start going through adventure and good experiences together. When you start doing things you have never tried before, you tend to strengthen your bond together and you will be able to see each other in a new light. You might feel then that you have missed out on each other for quite some time now.

Be creative when you are trying to save a relationship worth preserving. You can buy champagne and turn your ordinary TV viewing time an extraordinary date. You can also try writing sexy messages and surprises everyday. In this way, ordinary things become special and you become more connected with each other. By focusing on the ordinary and turning them extraordinary, you learn how to save a relationship.

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